returns, refunds, exchanges lol

Listen, you deluded optimists. Our platform obliterates your pathetic notions of consumer protection. Let us clarify what should be laughably obvious:

• Returns? Absolutely not. What part of "inherent worthlessness" did you fail to grasp? Your "Garbage Trash" acquisition is a permanent testament to your peculiar choices. No going back.

• Refunds? A preposterous suggestion. Your payment is a non-refundable contribution to a grand artistic statement, fuel for our next useless acquisition. Consider it a tax on your poor judgment.

• Exchanges? Don't be so predictable. Each item is a singular, unrepeatable, and utterly untrustworthy moment of curated refuse. Swapping one piece of garbage for another is beneath this experiment's intellectual rigor.

You might not even get your product. We revel in the unpredictable; your expectations mean nothing.

Lest your tiny minds shriek "SCAM!", let us correct you. This is not a scam. We are brazenly transparent: we genuinely earn your money through your willing participation, and yes, we absolutely spend it on other utterly useless things.The cycle continues, powered by your misguided desire to "collect." You are a vital, if foolish, cog in this beautiful, meaningless machine.